Doing the Thing You Think You Cannot Do - Examine Envision Emerge

Think about the last time you heard some news that made you shudder and say to yourself, "I have no idea what I'd do if that happened to me."

Or perhaps you know someone who has just been diagnosed with cancer, or someone whose loved one has passed unexpectedly, or someone who has been laid off, or whose spouse has just left them with no warning, and you've thought, "What would I do if that were me?"

Then you put it out of your mind because it hasn't happened to you, and, with luck, it never will.

Then one day, you get the phone call, hear the diagnosis, or watch your spouse drag a suitcase down the stairs and out the door. And in that instant, the light switch is flipped, your life changes, and you will never be the same.

The challenge with most life events is that the event often requires us to make informed decisions when we are emotionally incapable of doing so. Yet make decisions we must, and without some kind of planning or preparation, we often make them with disastrous results.

Of course, none of us can ever really know how we will respond to a particular life event until it actually happens. We may be intellectually prepared or financially prepared. But no one can be totally prepared for the emotional upheaval that usually comes with many life events.

That said, certain life events, no matter how unexpected, unsettling, or painful, carry with them certain common activities that can be done in advance. And it's much easier to do these things in good times than in bad.

It will come as no surprise that among the top 20 major stressors are death of a spouse or domestic partner, close family member or friend, or beloved pet; major personal injury or illness or change in health of family member; retirement from work; or changes in marital relationship.

Which is why, whether the event is one you anticipate or is imposed on you by something outside your control, you can – and should – make a plan. If you don't actively make time for the actions you need to do, they will very likely end up as one of those things you never get around to doing – until circumstances require that you do.

The focus of this book is on life event planning: the steps we can take to prepare for, and then successfully cope with, the events that make up our lives. Everything from the unforeseen, like divorce, loss of a job, or terminal illness, to the inevitable, like death and, for most of us, taxes. You will learn how to do the things that can be done in advance so that the emotional part of a life event doesn't cloud your judgment or render you incapable of action.

And once you've had the experience of "doing the thing you think you cannot do," you can face anything – and I promise you that you will survive.